I hear this word a good bit these days — preference. Choice. Option.
We all have this freedom to choose, to exercise our option. And this works…in isolation. When we have to merge preferences or compromise with another’s preference, then we have another choice: to stay with our preference in isolation or choose to grow through the tension of the merger.
Preference is power because it is intensely personal. It is part of our formed core, the part of us that exists because of early conditioning and teaching. What the grandparents, parents and other trusted voices teach us early on stick with us in strong “velcro-type” ways, on and under the surface. Preference is what gives us power, to know “our truth” is “right for us” and how to decide and if and when we yield. (And if we do yield, sadly, it may be with some conditions…for the sake of our preference living to fight another day.)
Just a thought —
What if we turned this power inside out?
What if we make our preference about more than us?
What if we consider the power of dual preference within a merger?
Are we less powerful or more powerful without the power of preference?
Do we fear loosening our grip on what’s familiar (our preference & associated reasoning)?
Or, do we yield to the adventure of merging and just trade or diminish or switch preferences? (seriously — who really runs into the fire?)
No man is an island…yet preferences are part of the foundation that supports us and the walls we think protect us. It’s a wild awakening, to be on the verge of a powerful merger, yet not see the positive promise and potential of dual preference because my preference has simply been with me longer. Limits die in the merging process because expansion is the nature of the merger — better together, doing more with more, and so on.
Translation: The merger is in the plan. So, addressing preference for the sake of the larger goal is in the plan.
Royal Ones, let’s take a deep breath together and lean into the tension and the change. All things still work together for our good because we love God and are the called according to His purpose…even in the exhaustion and consideration and hope and love and investment we pour into the merger.
A little more each day I find I do not want my preference’s power to work against me, where I lock myself out of positive promise and potential. I know you don’t want this either. Let’s keep doing the work. Let’s consider that better and greater really might wrapped up in the merger…and we’ve got to climb over some of our preferences to experience the benefit.
Some of the most resistant force is in us. I don’t want to miss another opportunity to self-correct and adjust…even improving my adjustment technique in the process. God is not just for us alone; He’s the “matchmaker” for the merger. We want His will at times, unaware that our participation is really required. Well, it is. So don’t quit now.
Selah, and love to all.